Going Vegan.... HELP!

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undeadfilth
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Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by undeadfilth »

Greetings, and salutations earthlings! I'm planning on going Vegan at the start of the year and really wanted some pointers. In the past I had been pescatarian for several years, but now I'm straight omnivore and I feel terrible and have put on alot of weight recently. Happened to stumble upon the Vegan Atheist while enjoying the wonders of Christopher Hitchens and now am pretty much convinced to swap to a Vegan lifestyle. I would love to do it sooner, but masking it as a New Year's resolution has made it easier for my fiance' and her family to dismiss. Yeah, they think it's a joke and have already delivered a fairly remarkable amount of mockery against me for it.

So, my main question is: are there any resources I should be looking into? I went to the book store and had no clue what to look for in their Vegan section, so just looking for some direction on that front. Any help is greatly appreciated. Thanks!
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Jebus
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by Jebus »

I would suggest you watch Earthlings and Gary Yourofsky's famous speech. The reason I write this is that unless you are convinced that consuming animal products is unethical you are likely to relapse. The fact that you are waiting for next year makes me think that you are not entirely convinced.

Anyways, there are lots of great resources on the Internet that assists new vegans.
By the way, did you already read through the sticky thread "How do I become Vegan" in this forum?
How to become vegan in 4.5 hours:
1.Watch Forks over Knives (Health)
2.Watch Cowspiracy (Environment)
3. Watch Earthlings (Ethics)
Congratulations, unless you are a complete idiot you are now a vegan.
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brimstoneSalad
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by brimstoneSalad »

I'm a little more concerned about the way your fiance is treating you; it sounds patronizing and disrespectful.

You may love her, but contrary to popular belief, love does not conquer all, and if it's this bad before the wedding, it will only get worse after. You need to level with her and explain that you need for there to be respect and support in the relationship, and that goes both ways.

If she isn't willing to respect you and your choices, that's a serious problem, and getting married will not fix it.

Using a new years' resolution as a cover shouldn't be necessary in a healthy relationship. Is it a clever way to go vegan in this situation? Maybe. But the fact that you feel you have to do it that way indicates a much more serious issue in the relationship.

Unless it is as Jebus says, and you aren't convinced of going vegan, which may be possible. But I think you are convinced, and that the issue is a psychological one around the relationship, which is something that needs to be dealt with rather than avoided with clever tricks.

Going vegan is easy if you have a supportive partner. Doing anything in a relationship of disrespect is nearly impossible.
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undeadfilth
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by undeadfilth »

Thanks for the replies! To clarify, I'm actually having a hard time continuing to consume meat currently. I think about all of the pain and suffering in a slice of cheese or a meat product and it actually starts making me feel ill. I want to start now, but feel like I needed the excuse to ease the fiance into it. Personally, I'm super eager to kick all of this disgusting food and proceed through life without feeling like an accessory to murder and torture. The family will get used to it. She threw the same fit when I went pescatarian before and then once I made that switch she didn't even notice. She's mostly worried that it will make things harder for her, which I explained that it didn't. Though, for some reason this choice is actually causing her some sever emotional stress. I'm not sure if it's because she feels guilty that she donates to animal support charities, yet continues to support animal abuse, torture and murder through her dietary habits(by the way, never call someone you love out on that and call them a hypocrite. Does not end well!).

Anyways, would love some good literature on Veganism including, but not limited to, cookbooks. Thanks!
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brimstoneSalad
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by brimstoneSalad »

Ask her to go vegan with you. Say it's something you're going to do with her or without her, but it can either be something that puts stress on your relationship and tears you apart (if she lets it), or something that you do together than brings you closer together. Tell her you love her, and want it to be something you do together than brings you closer, and that you know in her heart it's something she wants to do too because she loves animals so much, but she might be scared and if you take the leap together you can lean on each other for support.

The best thing you can do is take her to some good vegan restaurants, check happycow for some good local listings.
http://happycow.org

(by the way, never call someone you love out on that and call them a hypocrite. Does not end well!)
Well, it depends on how you do it. It sounds like she has a hot temper though.

You need to put this in perspective and ask yourself if you want to go through life having to be that careful about everything you say, being worried that being honest might set her off.
It's not easy to be with somebody like that. And marriage isn't some casual thing.

Again, I know you love her, but love won't fix that. Some relationships just don't work very well. Clashing personality types. If you two are clashing and not on the same page on important issues, it's better for both of you to talk about it, take some time apart, and maybe part friends instead of trying to stay together and hurting each other until you can't stand each other.

Most marriages fail because most people try to push through problems like this and force marriages (thinking love conquers all- which it does not) that aren't made to work in the first place, not because they break down from perfectly healthy and synergistic relationships.

As far as cook books- the internet is your best friend.

Check Post Punk kitchen; some great recipes there.
http://www.theppk.com/
Isa is really big on vegan comfort food, and that's really good for a transition.

Although it's not the healthiest vegan food, it gets you through the cravings and helps wean you onto healthier food over time.
TheAddict
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by TheAddict »

If you're looking to mask it better, there's a 30 day vegan challenge. Try it. Science has proven than after 22 days, habits form (both good and bad) and if your fiancee can be vegan for 30 days, one of two things could happen:

1. They'll go vegan with you.
2. They'll understand where you're coming from and will be more supportive.

It's fun, a great bonding experience and just an overall good time! :)

If you're looking for recipes, there's The Vegan Zombie. They have great recipes and most of them are pretty easy to make.
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miniboes
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by miniboes »

You also have the 21 day vegan kick start of PCRM. You could check that out!
http://www.pcrm.org/kickstartHome/
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PPP
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by PPP »

Hey undeadfilth, good for you!

About the fiance': I feel I want to chip in since my partner also happens to be an "animal loving" omnivore. It is possible to live in peace and harmony (so far... 1,5+ years) while still pertaining somewhat different lifestyles. If there is mutual respect and communication. Just sayin'..

About the transition: Just do it. It's easy. Take some B12, eat a varied diet with different colors and textures (mix it up - it's fun!) and drink your water.

Finally: Welcome to a greener, healthier and more peaceful living, where you can look yourself in the mirror and feel proud! :mrgreen:

My link tip "Should everyone go vegan?" debate : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=586jSyXfOVM
PrincessPeach
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by PrincessPeach »

Watch earthlings with her!!
Don't be a waste of molecules
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undeadfilth
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Re: Going Vegan.... HELP!

Post by undeadfilth »

Well, I have officially been vegan now for six days. Can't say I feel much different, but I am genuinely surprised by how much is still available for me to eat. Still catching shit from the fiance and family but I think now its mostly in jest. Luckily I have several close by eateries that offer a great selection of vegan menu items. Really not having a problem at all with this so far. Though, the smell of meat near me is starting to make me nauseous...
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