How should I respond to this?

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Take5
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How should I respond to this?

Post by Take5 »

I received this email from a relative in response to an email from me recommending he watch The China Study and/or What the Health, mentioning, ”The number one cause of death in America is not just heart disease, but more specifically sudden cardiac death. People dropping dead in their 30s, 40s, 50s.”

He came back with,
"Luckily we don’t live in America or China so I won't spend too long worrying about it, or in fact reading about it. To be honest most of my reading these days is constrained to how people communism killed. Or books with explosions/warships/jets on the front cover.

You will let me know when you get a medical qualification and are open for appointments? I'm sure you will.

Ps. How do you find the vegan at a dinner party? Dont worry he'll find you!"

My first reaction was to respond along the lines of "There's none so blind as those who will not see", but that would just close off the conversation and I don't want that.

I love the guy (and his family) dearly, but I'm at a loss to know where to go from here.
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brimstoneSalad
neither stone nor salad
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Re: How should I respond to this?

Post by brimstoneSalad »

There seems to be some significant hostility there.

You should probably talk in person, because email conversations like that could get very heated.
You'll be able to explain better what you were trying to say and answer concerns real-time.
ayamuz
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Re: How should I respond to this?

Post by ayamuz »

Remember that the point is not having the most witty answer or the most “correct” one. Having figures and research studies means nothing if it doesn’t start a real conversation.

To promote a face to face conversation you could say something like “I hope we can discuss how the results of these studies could apply to our population, since Chinese and American people seem to have a really different lifestyle and yet they share such a tragic reality”
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PsYcHo
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Re: How should I respond to this?

Post by PsYcHo »

Take5 wrote: Tue Dec 12, 2017 6:57 pm My first reaction was to respond along the lines of "There's none so blind as those who will not see", but that would just close off the conversation and I don't want that.

I love the guy (and his family) dearly, but I'm at a loss to know where to go from here.
Can I give you some advice from the perspective of someone who has at time been referenced as an "ass"? ( it's me. I'm often an ass)

If I were to make such a statement to a relative, it would likely be my attempt to use crude humor to convey that I'm not open to your suggestion at this time, but I want to continue a general dialogue. IOW- I disagree/don't care, but let's stay friendly because we're family.

It can be extremely trying when you bring to someone's attention something that you care passionately about, and they couldn't care less.

If your goal is to get people on your side, go gently. Maybe you could make a few dishes that you think your relative would like that are Vegan. If they like them, you could gently joke back "I didn't know you were going Vegan!".
Alcohol may have been a factor.

Taxation is theft.
Take5
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Joined: Thu Nov 17, 2016 6:10 pm
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Re: How should I respond to this?

Post by Take5 »

Thanks, folks - I think humour and understanding of his position is the way to go. After all, I was a big meat eater until I was 64 - and would have resisted any attempt to change my habits. The difference now, 16 years later, is that there is so much more info out there. It's a puzzle to me (and, I'm sure, many of you) that otherwise intelligent people refuse to face the facts. Conventional wisdoms and all that!

Hi ....

OK, I get the message - I understand where you're coming from. After all I was a big meat eater until my 60s and I would have resisted any attempt to change that. At least you have the info should you ever want to refer to it.

I sent that with a picture of a tiger, and the caption, "Goes on a vegan diet - eats 3 vegans a day, feels fabulous!" :D
Jamie in Chile
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Re: How should I respond to this?

Post by Jamie in Chile »

Your response was great! I suggest do not raise this topic again by email, just wait until he comes to you with a question or wait until this topic comes up naturally in conversation.
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