Defining offensive jokes

[Jebus]

Do you find the following joke offensive?

What is the difference between a nigger and a box of shit?

Answer: The box

If you think it's offensive would it make a difference if it were told by a white person or a black person? Would it make a difference if the joke were posted on Facebook or told behind closed doors?

I sometimes throw around racist and sexist jokes which some would brand as offensive. I see it completely differently. Racism (and sexism) is ridiculous and racists are ridiculous. When I tell a "racist" joke the butt of the joke is not the person of the particular race, but the racist and his/her ridiculous actions and ideas. I wish SJWs would understand this.

Jokes about the disabled, on the other hand, are usually offensive. Disabled people have, at least in recent history, been treated well by society so there is no doubt that the disabled are the butt of the joke. Mimicking the way they walk or mocking their movements (like Trump did last year) can therefore be offensive. However, I am not sure if any harm is done if these are told behind closed doors where no disabled (or easily impressionable people) are present.

[DarlBundren]

The less you care about your/other people's skin colour the funnier a racist joke gets. In order to find something funny you have to distance yourself from it. That's why we find it funny when someone falls down on the floor, but as soon as we realize that they may have hurt themselves our perspective change. This results in, at least, two possible situations. The first one, in which you find a racist joke funny because you are a racist yourself, the second, in which you find a racist joke funny because you don't really care about the matter or because you don't think it's a problem anymore. I have travelled a lot. Making fun of your and other people's culture may be a good way of overcoming cultural differences. But, only if your interlocutor is liberal/relaxed enough. Someone who has just lost a child is unlikely to find a dead-baby joke funny. They cannot distance themselves from it.