Philosophical Vegan Forum

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:I wish I was a wizard like Harry Potter and will go to Hogwarts.

Wish granted! You attend your first class, but on the way in the classroom you knock over another student's books. He is an accomplished wizard, but a Slitherin, and since you are in Huffle-puff, he uses a powerful spell that transforms you into a troll. You cannot stand to look at your troll-self, so you jump off a tower and die. Another student sees your bloody corpse, and tries to bring you back to full health, but he is weak and only manages to stave off your death, while keeping your broken body alive. Since trolls are long lived, you spend the next several centuries in a flattened troll body, unable to move or perform basic functions without help from other trolls, who often pee on you for fun.

I wish fried tofu didn't make me fart so much.

PsYcHo wrote:

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:I wish I was a wizard like Harry Potter and will go to Hogwarts.

Wish granted! You attend your first class, but on the way in the classroom you knock over another student's books. He is an accomplished wizard, but a Slitherin, and since you are in Huffle-puff, he uses a powerful spell that transforms you into a troll. You cannot stand to look at your troll-self, so you jump off a tower and die. Another student sees your bloody corpse, and tries to bring you back to full health, but he is weak and only manages to stave off your death, while keeping your broken body alive. Since trolls are long lived, you spend the next several centuries in a flattened troll body, unable to move or perform basic functions without help from other trolls, who often pee on you for fun.

I wish fried tofu didn't make me fart so much.

Wish granted. It now makes you shit yourself.

I wish I could eat glass and live.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:I wish I could eat glass and live.

Wish granted. Any glass you ingest will continually cause painful tissue damage which your body will rapidly regenerate only to have it torn by the glass and repaired again and again.

I wish for veganism to become a majority practice in the first world as soon as possible.

Cirion Spellbinder wrote:

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:I wish I could eat glass and live.

Wish granted. Any glass you ingest will continually cause painful tissue damage which your body will rapidly regenerate only to have it torn by the glass and repaired again and again.

I wish for veganism to become a majority practice in the first world as soon as possible.

Wish granted but cows, pigs and chickens are actually all secretly evil reptillian aliens from a far away planet who are trying to take over earth and by killing them for food, we have actually been doing a service by postponing alien domination of the world, now we have let our guard down, the aliens have taken over, All is lost.

I wish I could become Thomas the Tank Engine.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:

Cirion Spellbinder wrote:

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:I wish I could eat glass and live.

Wish granted. Any glass you ingest will continually cause painful tissue damage which your body will rapidly regenerate only to have it torn by the glass and repaired again and again.

I wish for veganism to become a majority practice in the first world as soon as possible.

Wish granted but cows, pigs and chickens are actually all secretly evil reptillian aliens from a far away planet who are trying to take over earth and by killing them for food, we have actually been doing a service by postponing alien domination of the world, now we have let our guard down, the aliens have taken over, All is lost.

I wish I could become Thomas the Tank Engine.

Nobody granted my wish so I'll grant it myself.

This is what happens:



Now, I wish South Korea would impeach Park Geun-hye and reunify with the North with Kim Jong-un as their glorious leader under a perfect Democratic Socialist Juche Songun society.

I wish I lived in Pee Pee's Gayhouse.

RedAppleGP wrote:I wish I lived in Pee Pee's Gayhouse.

GRAND MY WISH YOU SELFISH!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:

RedAppleGP wrote:I wish I lived in Pee Pee's Gayhouse.

GRAND MY WISH YOU SELFISH!

Grand is a verb?

RedAppleGP wrote:

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:

RedAppleGP wrote:I wish I lived in Pee Pee's Gayhouse.

GRAND MY WISH YOU SELFISH!

Grand is a verb?

Sorry, that was a typo. I meant grant.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:

RedAppleGP wrote:

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz wrote:
GRAND MY WISH YOU SELFISH!

Grand is a verb?

Sorry, that was a typo. I meant grant.

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